Those... those.. those... SHOES!!!!! best dressed man's shoes totally awesome
Monday, December 06, 2004
My ipoh trip
Hey all!!!
I'm back! from a wonderful wonderful weekend in Ipoh. It was just great to get away from KL for awhile to enjoy the easy-slow pace of ipoh, the good food (at reasonable prices), the ipoh-leng-lui (who is with me -- my gf! muaks!) and great companies of friends.
I also attended a friend's wedding and it was a blessed time to see everyone celebrating with him. It would be one of those occasion ppl will be talking about for years to come esp the early morning session where the bridgegroom have to 'prove himself worthy' at the door before he is let into the house of the bride.
This entry is about food really. I think it's a passion that has been recently unlocked and I'm all out to map out all the delicious yummies in ipoh.
There are 2 very outstanding makan session is noteworhty here. The first is the police-station-curry-mee. It's so yummy!!!!!! It has got this spice in it and taste very different from the 'normal' curry mee I've had. The blend of spices, chilli... etc makes whole event unforgetable really. Even Chou Yun Fatt came to the shop to taste the food between breaks during the shoot of 'The King and I'.
The other occasion, which i failed to document any picture with my digicam is me having timsum with Lawrence at -Tai Thong Restraunt on Sunday. Both of us ate rm40 worth of timsum! That's alot for Ipoh really! Muhahahahaha... The porridge and the carrot cake was mediocre but the other timsum tasted real fresh. They weren't over steamed so the juices was filled with flavour. The mixture of fillings in the tim sum was also done in good proportion.
Finding these great makan places is easy in ipoh. You tell your driver, or your friend who is taking you around the name of the food. For example if you want to eat the beef noodles in rainbow-city just say 'rainbow city beef noodles' or 'police station curry mee'. I've been to ipoh a few times. So far, my mental map of ipoh is landmarked by all the eating places... hehehe.
I'm back! from a wonderful wonderful weekend in Ipoh. It was just great to get away from KL for awhile to enjoy the easy-slow pace of ipoh, the good food (at reasonable prices), the ipoh-leng-lui (who is with me -- my gf! muaks!) and great companies of friends.
I also attended a friend's wedding and it was a blessed time to see everyone celebrating with him. It would be one of those occasion ppl will be talking about for years to come esp the early morning session where the bridgegroom have to 'prove himself worthy' at the door before he is let into the house of the bride.
This entry is about food really. I think it's a passion that has been recently unlocked and I'm all out to map out all the delicious yummies in ipoh.
There are 2 very outstanding makan session is noteworhty here. The first is the police-station-curry-mee. It's so yummy!!!!!! It has got this spice in it and taste very different from the 'normal' curry mee I've had. The blend of spices, chilli... etc makes whole event unforgetable really. Even Chou Yun Fatt came to the shop to taste the food between breaks during the shoot of 'The King and I'.
The other occasion, which i failed to document any picture with my digicam is me having timsum with Lawrence at -Tai Thong Restraunt on Sunday. Both of us ate rm40 worth of timsum! That's alot for Ipoh really! Muhahahahaha... The porridge and the carrot cake was mediocre but the other timsum tasted real fresh. They weren't over steamed so the juices was filled with flavour. The mixture of fillings in the tim sum was also done in good proportion.
Finding these great makan places is easy in ipoh. You tell your driver, or your friend who is taking you around the name of the food. For example if you want to eat the beef noodles in rainbow-city just say 'rainbow city beef noodles' or 'police station curry mee'. I've been to ipoh a few times. So far, my mental map of ipoh is landmarked by all the eating places... hehehe.
Wednesday, December 01, 2004
Segambut Fried Chicken Rice - awesome!
It tasted so good.. i decided to write a quick blog on it!
The shop is only open on wednesday and saturday. The shop which really is a bigger hawker stall is situated beside the road with zinc roof. It was already crowded when we got there at about 1245pm and by 1pm they are already selling out fast. Suprisingly i didn't feel too hot sitting there and the hygiene is pretty okay for a place like that, ie. no bad smell, no rats..etc
What so special about the chicken rice? first the service is so fast. You sit down. You order, it's there. The chicken is fried but not overly done. It's very juicy and yet the skin remains crispy. Added to that the chicken taste so flavourful. The kind after you finish with the skin (it's a must!) and meat, you 'suck' on the bones to get the juice out.
The 'oil' rice that comes with it also smells so good. Nicely done, not too oily and they manage to get the 'taste inside the rice'. Cantonese call it 'yap meh'.
The chilli is AWESOME. Dont' have much time to describe it but between the three of us, we finish about half a bowl - not rice bowl but noodle size bowl!
With such great chilli sauce, the dish is just isn't complete with 'spare parts' ie. the liver and the 'kai kan' (what is it call in english?) .
Between 3 of us we spent Rm26. 1 BIG plate of chicken + 1 small plate of 'spare parts' + extra chicken. 5 rice. 3 drinks. So the price is reasonable.
I haven't had such a lucn for a long time and I told my friend - the makan guru - Vincent Kwok - we gotta do that again next week. But first, the need to exercise.....
The shop is only open on wednesday and saturday. The shop which really is a bigger hawker stall is situated beside the road with zinc roof. It was already crowded when we got there at about 1245pm and by 1pm they are already selling out fast. Suprisingly i didn't feel too hot sitting there and the hygiene is pretty okay for a place like that, ie. no bad smell, no rats..etc
What so special about the chicken rice? first the service is so fast. You sit down. You order, it's there. The chicken is fried but not overly done. It's very juicy and yet the skin remains crispy. Added to that the chicken taste so flavourful. The kind after you finish with the skin (it's a must!) and meat, you 'suck' on the bones to get the juice out.
The 'oil' rice that comes with it also smells so good. Nicely done, not too oily and they manage to get the 'taste inside the rice'. Cantonese call it 'yap meh'.
The chilli is AWESOME. Dont' have much time to describe it but between the three of us, we finish about half a bowl - not rice bowl but noodle size bowl!
With such great chilli sauce, the dish is just isn't complete with 'spare parts' ie. the liver and the 'kai kan' (what is it call in english?) .
Between 3 of us we spent Rm26. 1 BIG plate of chicken + 1 small plate of 'spare parts' + extra chicken. 5 rice. 3 drinks. So the price is reasonable.
I haven't had such a lucn for a long time and I told my friend - the makan guru - Vincent Kwok - we gotta do that again next week. But first, the need to exercise.....
Sunday, November 28, 2004
SHOE warehouse SALES!
I went to a stock clearance sale with mom...twice this weekend! It was so much fun. Actually it's the same sale we went to. Once on Saturday and once on sunday. We went on Sunday again because when we got there on saturday, it began to rain and the stalls started to closed. I spotted this sandal that I really on Saturday but the salespeople said there were out of stock. We thought it was bull and decided to go there again on sunday. :)
Turns out they were not BSing. The stocks were really out in one day! (why have a 2 days sales anyway?) However, we ended up buying even more things on Sunday.
The rules of engagement is simple during a warehouse, stock clearance sale.
1. Know what you want before you head there. Time is crrrrruuucialllll. Don't go there thinking what you're about to buy. Know it before hand.
2. If you like and the price is right. Just take it first. (You can pay later in the counter). Wisdom behind this is that you never know when the stocks is going to run out. Take for example this item, there as a pack of 2 for $15 (or you buy 1 for $10). We hesistated, and by the time we head back, the 2 for $15 was gone.
3. If you think you might like it. Take it first
4. IF you think your friend/mom likes it. Take it first.
5. If you think.. maybe you like it. Take if first?
6. Time is crucial. Keep moving. There may be better things ahead. Hence you have to know rule no 1. well. Once you've spotted your item. Get it.
7. There is no rules with regards to queing. (elbow, sidestepping, shouting... is allowed)
Man... it was an experience. I felt like I was in a rock concert! Only this time, you don't get yuong screaming girls wearing sexy outfits fighting for space with you. (though that could be fun at first, it's still get tiring when you're just trying to enjoy the music) In this case, I was going against all types of people, ages, races, genders for the ultimate bargain. You name it. I try to remind myself that I shouldn't be fooled by their looks. No matter how harmless they look.... in this SALES scenario.. it's a BATTLEFIELD. You can't win them all. They come from all directions! So I had to choose my fights and win the war -- so I fought the good fight and I did manage to get this pair of really nice AND comfy working shoe for $120 (retailing at $238). Not bad heh :) .
On the side there was also a whole bunch of other stuffs being sold - cheese (yes cheese, I about 2 packs. ie 2 dozen slices. yum yum for my supper snacks!), nivea stuff (everything), kellog's Cornflakes, Ansell condoms, Sanitary Pads (generic brand), Wine, Cross pens, Toys... etc
Everything was going for 1/2 price or less. I think they were selling pampers as well and someone bought a trolley over and cleared everything. He bought heaps of sanitary pads too. I expect to see them in a nearby convenient store next week.
Some areas of intense bargaining battle are - woman's shoes, nivea section, man's working shoe.
Battle in woman's shoes section were intense. Casualty were high on ALL 5 - 7 coutners. These ppl are serious. Watch out for aunties who knows how to shop and has skills honed over the years. Most younger girls prefer to look pretty and watch, but few were deadly. Troop density high. Movement - rapid and unpredictable with frequent elbows and other advance technique. Noise level - high. Danger level - high! Proceed with caution.
Man's working shoe area. There's only 1 1/2 counter doing it so all the men flocked there. While the woman's section has a lot of questioning (how much is this? got this colour? got this size?), men's section are quieter. Troop density high. Movement - not so rapid coz of congestion (only 1 1/2 counter) however no elbows, but a lot of side stepping. Noise level - medium/low (they don't bargain as much). Dangel level - wuss (I think they do pretty well, but compared to the aunties in their tactics of buying, i think the men didn't fair so well)
Nivea section - read women's shoe section.
Me and my mom got there, bought what we wanted and got out in 30mins. Primary objectives: success - got nice working shoe.. Secondary objective: failer- that sandal no more size. Unimportant objectives: pletny of success - i got a ankle guard for $10 also! :P
Turns out they were not BSing. The stocks were really out in one day! (why have a 2 days sales anyway?) However, we ended up buying even more things on Sunday.
The rules of engagement is simple during a warehouse, stock clearance sale.
1. Know what you want before you head there. Time is crrrrruuucialllll. Don't go there thinking what you're about to buy. Know it before hand.
2. If you like and the price is right. Just take it first. (You can pay later in the counter). Wisdom behind this is that you never know when the stocks is going to run out. Take for example this item, there as a pack of 2 for $15 (or you buy 1 for $10). We hesistated, and by the time we head back, the 2 for $15 was gone.
3. If you think you might like it. Take it first
4. IF you think your friend/mom likes it. Take it first.
5. If you think.. maybe you like it. Take if first?
6. Time is crucial. Keep moving. There may be better things ahead. Hence you have to know rule no 1. well. Once you've spotted your item. Get it.
7. There is no rules with regards to queing. (elbow, sidestepping, shouting... is allowed)
Man... it was an experience. I felt like I was in a rock concert! Only this time, you don't get yuong screaming girls wearing sexy outfits fighting for space with you. (though that could be fun at first, it's still get tiring when you're just trying to enjoy the music) In this case, I was going against all types of people, ages, races, genders for the ultimate bargain. You name it. I try to remind myself that I shouldn't be fooled by their looks. No matter how harmless they look.... in this SALES scenario.. it's a BATTLEFIELD. You can't win them all. They come from all directions! So I had to choose my fights and win the war -- so I fought the good fight and I did manage to get this pair of really nice AND comfy working shoe for $120 (retailing at $238). Not bad heh :) .
On the side there was also a whole bunch of other stuffs being sold - cheese (yes cheese, I about 2 packs. ie 2 dozen slices. yum yum for my supper snacks!), nivea stuff (everything), kellog's Cornflakes, Ansell condoms, Sanitary Pads (generic brand), Wine, Cross pens, Toys... etc
Everything was going for 1/2 price or less. I think they were selling pampers as well and someone bought a trolley over and cleared everything. He bought heaps of sanitary pads too. I expect to see them in a nearby convenient store next week.
Some areas of intense bargaining battle are - woman's shoes, nivea section, man's working shoe.
Battle in woman's shoes section were intense. Casualty were high on ALL 5 - 7 coutners. These ppl are serious. Watch out for aunties who knows how to shop and has skills honed over the years. Most younger girls prefer to look pretty and watch, but few were deadly. Troop density high. Movement - rapid and unpredictable with frequent elbows and other advance technique. Noise level - high. Danger level - high! Proceed with caution.
Man's working shoe area. There's only 1 1/2 counter doing it so all the men flocked there. While the woman's section has a lot of questioning (how much is this? got this colour? got this size?), men's section are quieter. Troop density high. Movement - not so rapid coz of congestion (only 1 1/2 counter) however no elbows, but a lot of side stepping. Noise level - medium/low (they don't bargain as much). Dangel level - wuss (I think they do pretty well, but compared to the aunties in their tactics of buying, i think the men didn't fair so well)
Nivea section - read women's shoe section.
Me and my mom got there, bought what we wanted and got out in 30mins. Primary objectives: success - got nice working shoe.. Secondary objective: failer- that sandal no more size. Unimportant objectives: pletny of success - i got a ankle guard for $10 also! :P
Friday, November 19, 2004
Now that I'm self-learning...
it seems weird that I feel that I'm just beginning my journey of self-learning guitar. But that's how I feel after I've stopped my 'lesson' with Jose. Though, I have been mostly self-taught but I am most fortunate to always have friends and people around me to open doors and direct me to the next level. Also, I ask the people around me a lot of questions. Those who know who you are:- my sincere thanks :) my music now is in part what you guys/gals has passed on to me.
Perhaps the only thing that I have never done in my musical life is to SERIOUSLY set a goal for myself, dedicate time to it in getting there. It was always, 'playing' as compared to 'learning and practicing'. Boy, it's not easy practicing -- playing just gets in the way.
I suppose I have done some 'practising' in my guitar life but there's some power at work when decision give birth to discipline. The synergy of it all is quite amazing. I hope I can keep up the desire.
At this moment, I think I can pick pretty well at 100bpm with the new technique at quater notes. I'm still practicing the major scales at cycles of 4th. They are great in learning modes. I'm beginnign to discover after sometime I do have a clearer picture of all the major scales (and hence modes in the fret board) .
In addition to the picking, I'm doing legato practices on my left hand. I got this john petrucci rock discipline pt2 video. JP gives does an excellent job at showing how legato is done and how it can be used. He also show us how shamefully slow we are when he does his legato demos at blinding speed.
That's all for techniques practices. I'll be trying to transribe one song and learn the ins and outs of it. Its called mind games by bob james. Check out the track in his 'casino lights' version.
Lastly, a quote from Bruce Lee ,"it's not daily increase but daily decrease - hack away the unessentials"
Perhaps the only thing that I have never done in my musical life is to SERIOUSLY set a goal for myself, dedicate time to it in getting there. It was always, 'playing' as compared to 'learning and practicing'. Boy, it's not easy practicing -- playing just gets in the way.
I suppose I have done some 'practising' in my guitar life but there's some power at work when decision give birth to discipline. The synergy of it all is quite amazing. I hope I can keep up the desire.
At this moment, I think I can pick pretty well at 100bpm with the new technique at quater notes. I'm still practicing the major scales at cycles of 4th. They are great in learning modes. I'm beginnign to discover after sometime I do have a clearer picture of all the major scales (and hence modes in the fret board) .
In addition to the picking, I'm doing legato practices on my left hand. I got this john petrucci rock discipline pt2 video. JP gives does an excellent job at showing how legato is done and how it can be used. He also show us how shamefully slow we are when he does his legato demos at blinding speed.
That's all for techniques practices. I'll be trying to transribe one song and learn the ins and outs of it. Its called mind games by bob james. Check out the track in his 'casino lights' version.
Lastly, a quote from Bruce Lee ,"it's not daily increase but daily decrease - hack away the unessentials"
Tuesday, November 16, 2004
holiday ramblings
We graduate with a square hat for a round world. How ironic is that? It didn't teach us anything about life!
I went to Ikea later in the day and bought a luxury item! I'm a SUCKA! it's RM15 mouse pad! It's black and it's all leather (wrapped around a circullar piece of sheetmetal). It's a mouse pad with a lot of class (and one sucka).
Also, on sunday night, I went to a friend's house to chill out. It's an interesting place to be. There's about 12 of us, all in 20s and 30s, gathering to play pictionary and charades. Though, I agree with you that we may be too old for that shit, but it was great fun. The 12 of us are all very different in nature: character, body shape...etc but we are all very competitive. So it was havoc when the competition turns hot. There's lotsa bitching (2 of them and they are in my team. love them... does wonders to the guys on the opp team), swearing (colour vocabulary just gets better with more alcohol), there's this guy who is SO intense and slams the table whenever the time's up for our turn (he's got REALLY weird looking glasses I tell you)... There's another with the blinks and talks too much shit... there's the blur (who gets to be picked on to a charade for the movie basic instinct?), the sweet, the leaders (the natural born leaders) , the swearing again! (oh man!). There are boobs - the host has big boobs and loves showing off... (gee am i suppose to write that here? no ones seems to mind them tho) and she was bouncing up and down in excitement most of the time. She was so competitive and was bitching about everything to win. she was in my team, so I wasn't complaining. There was legs (they know who they are) There were dog lovers, movie lovers, there are the 'lawyers' (when things turn sour, they clarify the rules with the book. we need them). There was smoke everywhere and alcohol was all over the place. There was f* this and that, a perfect setting for a bar brawl really, except that this bunch are apparently hapkido pros... and the guy with the weird glasses is the trainer, he is not in my team. So I wont want to start it.
Nonetheless, Liping and I had so much fun hanging out. The people there are so real. They wont hide it if they don't like you! :P I think there were only 4 of us among the 12 that's christians and I am proud to say that we were just as competitive, most of them were quiet and nice. However, I did a little thrash talking though but really i was getting worried if a fight starts because I'd be picking at the hapkido guys.
I went to Ikea later in the day and bought a luxury item! I'm a SUCKA! it's RM15 mouse pad! It's black and it's all leather (wrapped around a circullar piece of sheetmetal). It's a mouse pad with a lot of class (and one sucka).
Also, on sunday night, I went to a friend's house to chill out. It's an interesting place to be. There's about 12 of us, all in 20s and 30s, gathering to play pictionary and charades. Though, I agree with you that we may be too old for that shit, but it was great fun. The 12 of us are all very different in nature: character, body shape...etc but we are all very competitive. So it was havoc when the competition turns hot. There's lotsa bitching (2 of them and they are in my team. love them... does wonders to the guys on the opp team), swearing (colour vocabulary just gets better with more alcohol), there's this guy who is SO intense and slams the table whenever the time's up for our turn (he's got REALLY weird looking glasses I tell you)... There's another with the blinks and talks too much shit... there's the blur (who gets to be picked on to a charade for the movie basic instinct?), the sweet, the leaders (the natural born leaders) , the swearing again! (oh man!). There are boobs - the host has big boobs and loves showing off... (gee am i suppose to write that here? no ones seems to mind them tho) and she was bouncing up and down in excitement most of the time. She was so competitive and was bitching about everything to win. she was in my team, so I wasn't complaining. There was legs (they know who they are) There were dog lovers, movie lovers, there are the 'lawyers' (when things turn sour, they clarify the rules with the book. we need them). There was smoke everywhere and alcohol was all over the place. There was f* this and that, a perfect setting for a bar brawl really, except that this bunch are apparently hapkido pros... and the guy with the weird glasses is the trainer, he is not in my team. So I wont want to start it.
Nonetheless, Liping and I had so much fun hanging out. The people there are so real. They wont hide it if they don't like you! :P I think there were only 4 of us among the 12 that's christians and I am proud to say that we were just as competitive, most of them were quiet and nice. However, I did a little thrash talking though but really i was getting worried if a fight starts because I'd be picking at the hapkido guys.
Saturday, November 06, 2004
angel in the wind
I had a very tiring day today. I woke up slightly before nine to take my gf's 1960s VW to the workshop. The VW had a major oil leakage problem and all the petrol that we fill in was leaked and stunk up our entired porch where we parked the car. We decided to fill the car up anyway and dash to the workshop.
Unfortunenately, the battery died, so we had to jump start the car.
Fortunately, we have done it before.
Unfortunenately, we don't have the cables.
Fortunately, my neighbour have them
Unfortunenately, they are pretty useless. Somehow his cables were useless. We charged the VW for about 40mins and it didn't work
Fortunately, Lionel have a set and we went to BU to get it from him.
Fortunately, it worked so well the car started in like 30secs. So we were able to take the car to the workshop and stood there to see it fixed. (why we stood there and monitor it the whole time is another long long story) The guys did a good job fixing the petrol leakages and we were out in about 1 hour
Unfortunenately, the 1 week old battery died halfway while we were going up the slope (towards BU to make a u-turn on the overhead bridge to head back towards bangsar) and I was surprise that it couldn't be charged.
Fortunately, I had the jumper cables handy this time and quickly revive the car. This time I decided to drive for at least 30mins to charge back the battery.
Unfortunenately, it started to rain very heavily. Visibility is down to zero. I couldn't switch on the air-con or the wipre or the headlights. because once i do the car battery wouldn't hold the load and die.
Fortunately, I didn't have to for my 30min drive
Unfortunenately, on my way back the rain got even heavier. and I was racing down a slope with ZERO visibility. My wipers & headlights were not on. I had to switch one of them on. This time the car died at a junction of a housing area--> in the middle of it and cars was just minding their own business zooming past me.
Fortunately, I had my celphone with me. I issued an SOS to liping and she was on her way. What else could i do but to pray? and I had a good time of prayers in the car. Just when i felt a 'break' in my spirit. my gf arrived - she had umbrella, spare change all ready!
Unfortunenately, the rain was really heavy. I had to be in the car because she didn't know how to jump start it. whcih means she had to push. which really suck to have your gf push u in the heavy rain while you're driving. just when she was about to come out of her car into the rain....
FORTUNATELY, out of no where.. my knight in wet soaked clothes. boots and a safety helmet. A construction worker from a nearby site came and ask me sheepishly in malay if he could help! I almost felt shy that he asked. But yes. He gave the car a push, I managed to jump start the car and drove home.
Praise God for the help he sent me.
Unfortunenately, the battery died, so we had to jump start the car.
Fortunately, we have done it before.
Unfortunenately, we don't have the cables.
Fortunately, my neighbour have them
Unfortunenately, they are pretty useless. Somehow his cables were useless. We charged the VW for about 40mins and it didn't work
Fortunately, Lionel have a set and we went to BU to get it from him.
Fortunately, it worked so well the car started in like 30secs. So we were able to take the car to the workshop and stood there to see it fixed. (why we stood there and monitor it the whole time is another long long story) The guys did a good job fixing the petrol leakages and we were out in about 1 hour
Unfortunenately, the 1 week old battery died halfway while we were going up the slope (towards BU to make a u-turn on the overhead bridge to head back towards bangsar) and I was surprise that it couldn't be charged.
Fortunately, I had the jumper cables handy this time and quickly revive the car. This time I decided to drive for at least 30mins to charge back the battery.
Unfortunenately, it started to rain very heavily. Visibility is down to zero. I couldn't switch on the air-con or the wipre or the headlights. because once i do the car battery wouldn't hold the load and die.
Fortunately, I didn't have to for my 30min drive
Unfortunenately, on my way back the rain got even heavier. and I was racing down a slope with ZERO visibility. My wipers & headlights were not on. I had to switch one of them on. This time the car died at a junction of a housing area--> in the middle of it and cars was just minding their own business zooming past me.
Fortunately, I had my celphone with me. I issued an SOS to liping and she was on her way. What else could i do but to pray? and I had a good time of prayers in the car. Just when i felt a 'break' in my spirit. my gf arrived - she had umbrella, spare change all ready!
Unfortunenately, the rain was really heavy. I had to be in the car because she didn't know how to jump start it. whcih means she had to push. which really suck to have your gf push u in the heavy rain while you're driving. just when she was about to come out of her car into the rain....
FORTUNATELY, out of no where.. my knight in wet soaked clothes. boots and a safety helmet. A construction worker from a nearby site came and ask me sheepishly in malay if he could help! I almost felt shy that he asked. But yes. He gave the car a push, I managed to jump start the car and drove home.
Praise God for the help he sent me.
Wednesday, November 03, 2004
learning music
I'm glad i made the decision to to stop lessons with jose for the time being.
Besides financial reasons, somehow I feel 'lighter'. It's probably the fear of hearing him saying another 'NO' to me!
The next step would be to increase my lines vocabulary and improve on the clarity of my tones when im picking. I'm still practicing the major scales at all positions in cycles of fourth. Still trying to do it everyday for 1 hour. Consistency, i think is the best teacher. I'm learning new lines as I play the scales over and over again.
I'm also goign to purchase a few books. Jazz Guitar Chord System (Acoustic Guitar Magazine's Private Lessons) -- by scott henderson. will be one of them. I'm trying to get hold of Joe Satrianis book too.
I am thinknig now, the ingredients I then need to improve =
1) desire to improve (i have to know why am i doing what im doing - my objectives...etc)
2) decide how much resources I am going to put in
3) Action plan and stick with it.
4) constantly think about 1) to keep realigning myself and focus.
Besides financial reasons, somehow I feel 'lighter'. It's probably the fear of hearing him saying another 'NO' to me!
The next step would be to increase my lines vocabulary and improve on the clarity of my tones when im picking. I'm still practicing the major scales at all positions in cycles of fourth. Still trying to do it everyday for 1 hour. Consistency, i think is the best teacher. I'm learning new lines as I play the scales over and over again.
I'm also goign to purchase a few books. Jazz Guitar Chord System (Acoustic Guitar Magazine's Private Lessons) -- by scott henderson. will be one of them. I'm trying to get hold of Joe Satrianis book too.
I am thinknig now, the ingredients I then need to improve =
1) desire to improve (i have to know why am i doing what im doing - my objectives...etc)
2) decide how much resources I am going to put in
3) Action plan and stick with it.
4) constantly think about 1) to keep realigning myself and focus.
Sunday, October 31, 2004
Music direction
I've been thinking about my music.
I think it is God's will that I met with Jose and him having to correct my picking technique. Correctly my 'timing' issues and get me particular about sound. or being particular about everything.
but.. there's always a but...
I really feel that i need someone to open new musical doors for me to explore. and honestly following a certain technique of picking really isn't helping. (though the technique is gonna help me go further in terms of speed and all that)
It really boils down to me. I've been asking ppl this question and not to myself. where do i wanna go with my music? I think i should decide on that. and then transcribe an artist closest to that. I spoke to Anson briefly and he is okay with spending a lil bit of time each week with me helping my transpose and explaning to me the notes and all... that sounds like a good idea. Plus i'll be getting help for all you guys who read my blogs right? Some materials to work my way up. What do u think guys?
I think it is God's will that I met with Jose and him having to correct my picking technique. Correctly my 'timing' issues and get me particular about sound. or being particular about everything.
but.. there's always a but...
I really feel that i need someone to open new musical doors for me to explore. and honestly following a certain technique of picking really isn't helping. (though the technique is gonna help me go further in terms of speed and all that)
It really boils down to me. I've been asking ppl this question and not to myself. where do i wanna go with my music? I think i should decide on that. and then transcribe an artist closest to that. I spoke to Anson briefly and he is okay with spending a lil bit of time each week with me helping my transpose and explaning to me the notes and all... that sounds like a good idea. Plus i'll be getting help for all you guys who read my blogs right? Some materials to work my way up. What do u think guys?
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
jose's not free
Jose Thomas isn't free last week, and looks like he is gonna be busy this week also. Also, Since I'm only free on monday nights, I don't think I will be able to see him this week.
Anyhow, I've been working on my picking, and it's coming along slowly.. very slowly. I'm also working on all my major scales in cycles of fourth at 80 bpm. I think I'm pretty comfortable with that now, so I'm doing some 8th notes as well. I am trying to familiar myself with the all the major scale everywhere in the fretboard. That means about 4 formations for each scale within 1-12 frets. I'm gonna practice these 4 formations for all the scales in cycles of fourth.
I guess I've been lazy to get down to all these up to this point. But I am thinking, if I am to learn how to play jazz well, knowing the fret board inside out is definitely a must to begin with.
Also, the last few weeks of practicing scales, I'm amazed that I'm actually hearing new things from the scales. I think the repetetion does something to our minds. (it's called brainwashing) I'm hearing new lines.
Rediscovering the guitar is a fascinating experience. It makes the pain of re-learning almost bearable.
Anyhow, I've been working on my picking, and it's coming along slowly.. very slowly. I'm also working on all my major scales in cycles of fourth at 80 bpm. I think I'm pretty comfortable with that now, so I'm doing some 8th notes as well. I am trying to familiar myself with the all the major scale everywhere in the fretboard. That means about 4 formations for each scale within 1-12 frets. I'm gonna practice these 4 formations for all the scales in cycles of fourth.
I guess I've been lazy to get down to all these up to this point. But I am thinking, if I am to learn how to play jazz well, knowing the fret board inside out is definitely a must to begin with.
Also, the last few weeks of practicing scales, I'm amazed that I'm actually hearing new things from the scales. I think the repetetion does something to our minds. (it's called brainwashing) I'm hearing new lines.
Rediscovering the guitar is a fascinating experience. It makes the pain of re-learning almost bearable.
Tuesday, October 19, 2004
Cedar Trees
A couple of days ago a friend was telling me what he learnt about the cedar tree.
Apparently the Cedar grows slowly in the first 10 or so years. During this time, it is building it's root. It is searching for the underground water table. When it's foundation set, boom, it grows. Tall. I haven't been able to verify this from sites in the internet, if someone could help that would be great.
But what I did find what that the Cedar of Lebanon can only bear fruit to reproduce at about 25 to 30 years old. It grows better in mountanious region, it gives better wood. The ones used for Solomon Temples are these types. (http://www.2020site.org/trees/lebanon.html)
I heard that, (another myth?? please help verfiy), some bamboos also grow very slowly at first. Until the roots are firm, boom, it shoots up real fast.
Learning from nature, building roots and foundation is slow, grueling and no fun. On site, it's also difficult to impress the clients after the foundation is laid. Visually, there's 'nothing' to be seen. But everyone know how crucial foundations are in building. So it is the word of God, in the foundation of our lives.
Visually, there's 'nothing' to be seen.
However, when it starts to grow... BOOM. The same forces/principle of physics that can topple a building is keeping it up. The forces remains the same. But the building just got higher.
Life is the same thing, govern by God's principals. Don't believe me. Try it. It either pulls u down or push u up.
I pray that I'm growing and maturing, by growing deeper with the knowledge, experience...etc of Him and His love.
Apparently the Cedar grows slowly in the first 10 or so years. During this time, it is building it's root. It is searching for the underground water table. When it's foundation set, boom, it grows. Tall. I haven't been able to verify this from sites in the internet, if someone could help that would be great.
But what I did find what that the Cedar of Lebanon can only bear fruit to reproduce at about 25 to 30 years old. It grows better in mountanious region, it gives better wood. The ones used for Solomon Temples are these types. (http://www.2020site.org/trees/lebanon.html)
I heard that, (another myth?? please help verfiy), some bamboos also grow very slowly at first. Until the roots are firm, boom, it shoots up real fast.
Learning from nature, building roots and foundation is slow, grueling and no fun. On site, it's also difficult to impress the clients after the foundation is laid. Visually, there's 'nothing' to be seen. But everyone know how crucial foundations are in building. So it is the word of God, in the foundation of our lives.
Visually, there's 'nothing' to be seen.
However, when it starts to grow... BOOM. The same forces/principle of physics that can topple a building is keeping it up. The forces remains the same. But the building just got higher.
Life is the same thing, govern by God's principals. Don't believe me. Try it. It either pulls u down or push u up.
I pray that I'm growing and maturing, by growing deeper with the knowledge, experience...etc of Him and His love.
Thursday, October 14, 2004
Uncle had a successful heart surgery
My uncle, who had an heart 4 weeks ago, went for this bypass surgery on tuesday 2 days ago.
Praise God everything went on smoothly and he is already talking and had his first meal after surgery yesterday -- Waltz Ice-cream.
He not only had a 'heart surgery' in SJMC, my uncle who is kinda a nominal christian must have had a 'heart surgery' from God also. He is praying and seeking the lord more. He even ask me to pray for him before I left. This has never happenned before !! did I say never? My aunt was happy that my uncle is changing. Uncle also told me that after this, his priority is going to change. I suspect more towards relationship with his family, God...etc and I think he'll be going to church regularly.
I felt previledged to be able to pray for my uncle. I thank God for it because I'm looking forward to the day where my whole family - extended included - can worship together in the same place. shh.. chinese new year will be a massive time of worship!!!
Though my uncle is in the ICU, my uncle and my aunt had a quiet joy in them. They are just happy being together... hahaha like young love birds.
One last thing before I blog-off.
I also had a chat with my aunt during my visit. (the nurse was tending to uncle and we had to wait outside) My aunt who isn't very educated academically has an AMAZING understanding of biblical concepts of love. She can't understand much english... I think her only bible is one of those with pictures!! (hahahaa! she laugh at it when she told me) But as she was talking about love, about family, about parents and about children... simple lady, simple truths hit home with me.
Praise God everything went on smoothly and he is already talking and had his first meal after surgery yesterday -- Waltz Ice-cream.
He not only had a 'heart surgery' in SJMC, my uncle who is kinda a nominal christian must have had a 'heart surgery' from God also. He is praying and seeking the lord more. He even ask me to pray for him before I left. This has never happenned before !! did I say never? My aunt was happy that my uncle is changing. Uncle also told me that after this, his priority is going to change. I suspect more towards relationship with his family, God...etc and I think he'll be going to church regularly.
I felt previledged to be able to pray for my uncle. I thank God for it because I'm looking forward to the day where my whole family - extended included - can worship together in the same place. shh.. chinese new year will be a massive time of worship!!!
Though my uncle is in the ICU, my uncle and my aunt had a quiet joy in them. They are just happy being together... hahaha like young love birds.
One last thing before I blog-off.
I also had a chat with my aunt during my visit. (the nurse was tending to uncle and we had to wait outside) My aunt who isn't very educated academically has an AMAZING understanding of biblical concepts of love. She can't understand much english... I think her only bible is one of those with pictures!! (hahahaa! she laugh at it when she told me) But as she was talking about love, about family, about parents and about children... simple lady, simple truths hit home with me.
Tuesday, October 12, 2004
Guitar Lessons with Jose Thomas week 2
"Oh.. eric! your timing is bad. you have a lot to work on your timing"
"Equal volume on your down and upstroke"
"Watch your wrist"
"timing! timing! timing!"
"you're... rushing!....(pause) rushing again!"
So on week 2, I discover that my wrist is getting better acquianted to the down/up motion. But I have trouble with my uniformity on my downstroke/upstroke picking.
I think it's because I have always used my the 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 as my mark, as a result, I tend to accent on the downstroke. When I need try to play it uniformly, I loose my anchor on the timing and hence can't 'lock' on the tempo. My fingers are esp 'lost' during the upbeats. With all things combine, it sounds horrible to be unable to keep time on the upbeats and the uneven picking volume.
So my task this week is to practice all the major scales starting from G major and rotate around the fretboard in circles of 4th. ie. G - C - F - Bb....etc over and over and over and over and over again.
Its frustrating for me to work on this. because 2 weeks I ago, I was pretty confident that I can pick. run scales. and I thought I had good tones.
Now, I'm brought back to school first by changing my entire picking style and honing on my timing. Which reminded me that
1. guitar playing like any part of life- it's all about fundamental, which really are the building blocks of fun. (I heard this from Edmund Chan tape, people use to go to him expecting something profound, but he said he has nothing profound... just go back to basics. Seems like I'm experiencign the same thing with Jose)
2. choose our mentors carefully - I think most of the people who influenced me in the past paid more attentions to chords, voicings and rhythm comping. Hence I never found any problem with my picking. I urge all new players out there... choose your teachers carefully and learn solid basics.
I
3. It's never too late to break a habit. Change is a pathway to maturity. It's essential to growth. Discipline is need to bring about the transformation.
"Equal volume on your down and upstroke"
"Watch your wrist"
"timing! timing! timing!"
"you're... rushing!....(pause) rushing again!"
So on week 2, I discover that my wrist is getting better acquianted to the down/up motion. But I have trouble with my uniformity on my downstroke/upstroke picking.
I think it's because I have always used my the 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 as my mark, as a result, I tend to accent on the downstroke. When I need try to play it uniformly, I loose my anchor on the timing and hence can't 'lock' on the tempo. My fingers are esp 'lost' during the upbeats. With all things combine, it sounds horrible to be unable to keep time on the upbeats and the uneven picking volume.
So my task this week is to practice all the major scales starting from G major and rotate around the fretboard in circles of 4th. ie. G - C - F - Bb....etc over and over and over and over and over again.
Its frustrating for me to work on this. because 2 weeks I ago, I was pretty confident that I can pick. run scales. and I thought I had good tones.
Now, I'm brought back to school first by changing my entire picking style and honing on my timing. Which reminded me that
1. guitar playing like any part of life- it's all about fundamental, which really are the building blocks of fun. (I heard this from Edmund Chan tape, people use to go to him expecting something profound, but he said he has nothing profound... just go back to basics. Seems like I'm experiencign the same thing with Jose)
2. choose our mentors carefully - I think most of the people who influenced me in the past paid more attentions to chords, voicings and rhythm comping. Hence I never found any problem with my picking. I urge all new players out there... choose your teachers carefully and learn solid basics.
I
3. It's never too late to break a habit. Change is a pathway to maturity. It's essential to growth. Discipline is need to bring about the transformation.
Wednesday, October 06, 2004
Guitar Lessons with Jose Thomas
I finally went for my 1st lesson with Jose.
It was an unforgettable experience. I felt like I was the worst player and the worst student in the world.
First lesson, I learn how to pick. Pick completely with wrist action going up/down, without any 'twist' to your wrist. It's a hard thing for me to do because I have to throw all that I've been doing away. So all I have to do this week is practice my scales at beat 70, using F, G, A lydian starting a the 6th string - 1st fret. which is really C, D, E major. Everday for at least 1 hour. (he prefers 2 - 3 minimum)
He is of the opinion that do it his way, or no way when it comes to techniques (and every other thing?), I guess. So 1 hour everyday, here I go.
It was an unforgettable experience. I felt like I was the worst player and the worst student in the world.
First lesson, I learn how to pick. Pick completely with wrist action going up/down, without any 'twist' to your wrist. It's a hard thing for me to do because I have to throw all that I've been doing away. So all I have to do this week is practice my scales at beat 70, using F, G, A lydian starting a the 6th string - 1st fret. which is really C, D, E major. Everday for at least 1 hour. (he prefers 2 - 3 minimum)
He is of the opinion that do it his way, or no way when it comes to techniques (and every other thing?), I guess. So 1 hour everyday, here I go.
Thursday, September 30, 2004
Monster! r US
Recently, when I was in MPH, I browsed through Traci Lord's autobiography. The actress who first got famous as a porn star.
At about the same time, I watched the movie Monster - starring charlize theron - about the 1st convicted woman serial killer, Aileen (something)
What strike me was that both Traci and Chalize was gorgeous... no, that's not my point :)
That both had very bad start in their growing up years.
Aileen was raped at 8, when she told her dad that she was raped by her dad's best friend she was beated. She then grew up deprieved of love and always seeking it - in the wrong places and from the wrong ppl. She ran away from home and started as a prostitute at 15. Monster was a movie about Aileen crossing the line of 'evil'. At the end, she was sentenced to death for killing 7 men.
Traci, was raped by 9 (i think, i can't quite remember but thereabouts) had an abortion at 12, and was introduced to the porn world by her mom's boyfriend at 15. She had an abusive dad. At 18, she was caught by the FBI for holding a fake ID and doing porn underage coz she started at 15. She also then met a lawyer who changed her life. Her mom and family accepted her back. Quit drugs. Changed her life. Now she stars as an actress doing some tv shows and is married.
It is real inspiration to be able to read how Traci rise up above her situation and sad and very disturbing to see Charlize play Aileen. (she deserved the oscar!). Even scarier when I thought about how our lives can take different paths with similiar beginnings. What was the difference? I think many ppl will take many different views on it.
As for me, I think we all have a Monster in us. Love makes all the difference. Afterall, it's Love that makes the world goes round.
At about the same time, I watched the movie Monster - starring charlize theron - about the 1st convicted woman serial killer, Aileen (something)
What strike me was that both Traci and Chalize was gorgeous... no, that's not my point :)
That both had very bad start in their growing up years.
Aileen was raped at 8, when she told her dad that she was raped by her dad's best friend she was beated. She then grew up deprieved of love and always seeking it - in the wrong places and from the wrong ppl. She ran away from home and started as a prostitute at 15. Monster was a movie about Aileen crossing the line of 'evil'. At the end, she was sentenced to death for killing 7 men.
Traci, was raped by 9 (i think, i can't quite remember but thereabouts) had an abortion at 12, and was introduced to the porn world by her mom's boyfriend at 15. She had an abusive dad. At 18, she was caught by the FBI for holding a fake ID and doing porn underage coz she started at 15. She also then met a lawyer who changed her life. Her mom and family accepted her back. Quit drugs. Changed her life. Now she stars as an actress doing some tv shows and is married.
It is real inspiration to be able to read how Traci rise up above her situation and sad and very disturbing to see Charlize play Aileen. (she deserved the oscar!). Even scarier when I thought about how our lives can take different paths with similiar beginnings. What was the difference? I think many ppl will take many different views on it.
As for me, I think we all have a Monster in us. Love makes all the difference. Afterall, it's Love that makes the world goes round.
Monday, September 27, 2004
being a man pt 2 - identity
Ever since Pastor Edmund Chan came to our church for the one day speaking on discipleship and utterred these words: identity is a relational word. It has been stuck to my mind.
The concept really is changing my life's perspective.
Identity used to be a 'static' word to me. I am my father's son. My dad's and mom's name is so and so. I'm working as a blah blah blah. I am a Christian. I am a child of the living God....etc Perhaps these should be classified in my mental map better as identification.
However, when I think of identity as a relational word, it is now a dynamic word. I'm not just my father's son. My relationship with him gives my being, identity. It is also the same with God, my mom, friends...etc etc. The relationship not only identify me it shapes me and gives me meaning.
(Perhaps, it's like watching CSI on tv. First the crime scene is documented, and the suspect. Facts and figures can only give that much info. It's through the relationship of the victim and the murderer that gives the whole episode the motive, the fear, the emotions the meaning. )
The 2 questions that we always ask ourselvs: who am I and what am I doing here? (did you know that you're incredible and unique just because you can ask yourself that question!)
(Paster Edmund said it this way) Who am I and what am I doing here? Perhaps I have to look at who I serve and who is my master.
Among the many wisdom I took home that day with Pastor Edmund, this gem would be my most prized find.
****************
I started to ask a series a questions about myself and the relationships that I am in. Especially my relationship with my dad. It's getting late, so I guess, I'll leave this to pt 3.
****************
The concept really is changing my life's perspective.
Identity used to be a 'static' word to me. I am my father's son. My dad's and mom's name is so and so. I'm working as a blah blah blah. I am a Christian. I am a child of the living God....etc Perhaps these should be classified in my mental map better as identification.
However, when I think of identity as a relational word, it is now a dynamic word. I'm not just my father's son. My relationship with him gives my being, identity. It is also the same with God, my mom, friends...etc etc. The relationship not only identify me it shapes me and gives me meaning.
(Perhaps, it's like watching CSI on tv. First the crime scene is documented, and the suspect. Facts and figures can only give that much info. It's through the relationship of the victim and the murderer that gives the whole episode the motive, the fear, the emotions the meaning. )
The 2 questions that we always ask ourselvs: who am I and what am I doing here? (did you know that you're incredible and unique just because you can ask yourself that question!)
(Paster Edmund said it this way) Who am I and what am I doing here? Perhaps I have to look at who I serve and who is my master.
Among the many wisdom I took home that day with Pastor Edmund, this gem would be my most prized find.
****************
I started to ask a series a questions about myself and the relationships that I am in. Especially my relationship with my dad. It's getting late, so I guess, I'll leave this to pt 3.
****************
Musing on Saying Grace
At t=0, I picked up my fork and spoon. Opened my mouth to say grace...
I suddenly was filled with question WHY?
Why am I saying grace before each meal? Is it a churchy tradition that's been followed worldwide? Where in the bible did it mention about saying grace before meals? I did remember Jesus giving thanks before he broke the bread but it was never mentioned as a 'command'. I wonder then if it is a theological issue? If it is not, then we certainly shouldn't give such a big fuss about it. If it is then we should keep it.
I wondered also, if I am making it a rule that ppl should follow? Am I saying my grace because it also appears more religious and therefore I'm holier than those believers who don't say it? I wondered also, how many of us think about why we are saying grace while we are saying it.
about 0.5 seconds later, my fork touched down on the delicious fish. I said my grace... the rest is fishstory :)
I often thank the lord for the food before i eat them. whether its for a snack, a instant noodle meal or a 9 course dinner. I said often because sometimes I do forget. Though it still eludes me why i should forget to say grace, i still do because by now it should be a habit.
Most of the time - most of the time - saying grace to me is not mechanical. Though I say it in one sentence and in a single breath just before i devour on my first bite (and sometimes after I pick up my cutlery), saying grace is most of the time not mechanical to me.
I feel so bless really to be able to eat. There are just so many tastes, textures, colours, it's amazing just what humanity has come out with to temp our taste buds. Can you tell I love food now? hahahaha Also because these recent years has been so difficult, there were times, I'm amazed that I still have food to eat. I'm just simply amazed, because I am able to, and I have food, simply to fill my tummy. He truly is our provider.
Most of the time, when I say grace, I pray about something. It's great to do that because then I know I will at the very least pray twice during lunch and dinner, for I often skip breakfast. Maybe just once, for dinner if that happens to be my only meal. Somehow, I also know that the lord hears my short prayer and will answer it.
I suddenly was filled with question WHY?
Why am I saying grace before each meal? Is it a churchy tradition that's been followed worldwide? Where in the bible did it mention about saying grace before meals? I did remember Jesus giving thanks before he broke the bread but it was never mentioned as a 'command'. I wonder then if it is a theological issue? If it is not, then we certainly shouldn't give such a big fuss about it. If it is then we should keep it.
I wondered also, if I am making it a rule that ppl should follow? Am I saying my grace because it also appears more religious and therefore I'm holier than those believers who don't say it? I wondered also, how many of us think about why we are saying grace while we are saying it.
about 0.5 seconds later, my fork touched down on the delicious fish. I said my grace... the rest is fishstory :)
I often thank the lord for the food before i eat them. whether its for a snack, a instant noodle meal or a 9 course dinner. I said often because sometimes I do forget. Though it still eludes me why i should forget to say grace, i still do because by now it should be a habit.
Most of the time - most of the time - saying grace to me is not mechanical. Though I say it in one sentence and in a single breath just before i devour on my first bite (and sometimes after I pick up my cutlery), saying grace is most of the time not mechanical to me.
I feel so bless really to be able to eat. There are just so many tastes, textures, colours, it's amazing just what humanity has come out with to temp our taste buds. Can you tell I love food now? hahahaha Also because these recent years has been so difficult, there were times, I'm amazed that I still have food to eat. I'm just simply amazed, because I am able to, and I have food, simply to fill my tummy. He truly is our provider.
Most of the time, when I say grace, I pray about something. It's great to do that because then I know I will at the very least pray twice during lunch and dinner, for I often skip breakfast. Maybe just once, for dinner if that happens to be my only meal. Somehow, I also know that the lord hears my short prayer and will answer it.
Sunday, September 12, 2004
Funeral
My granddad's funeral was held in Nirvana Memorial Park. The company is worth writting a book on. In a nutshell, a listed company specialising in the 'Funeral' Industry.
To begin with, Nirvana Memorial Park building is a large building - or a large funeral parlour - with plush interior. Almost everyone, if not all, who walked into the reception thought that they have initially go into the wrong place. The notion that a funeral parlour was like a hotel is still quite puzzling to me. They have many rooms in it, like a five star hotel, to conduct many funeral services. Think of it as a FIVE STAR HOTEL for the dead. And yes, they cater to buddhist, taoist, christian...etc. Yeah, you got the picture. Personally, (at least on surface), Nirvana may be a good company to invest in. I don' t think their business model will ever change or need a change for that matter. The system is set.
My granddad's funeral was conducted in a typical buddhist manner. Monks were doing the ritual everynight until the morning that he is buried. All the sons, daughters, grandson, granddaughters and all their spouses are required to join in.
Spiritually, they were doing something. Obviously with joss-sticks, chants, kneeling and bowing, some spiritual exchange was taking place. Although some may disagree with me, I stick to my case. If not, then why do we need the monks chanting, why the joss-stick...etc Out of respect for my granddad and also to my father and all the rest of my family, I joined in the ritual at first. It was not easy and I felt uncomfortable, because I only want to worship Christ - spiritually. After the first 'session; I stopped joining the ritual. This caused a lot of hushed murmur amongst the family. Later in that night, I also had a big arguement with my brother, whom I have not fought with since our childhood days over toys. The arguement probably lasted 2 days.
(The peace of God has never left me, even when im doing the rituals because I focused on the Lord. However, I felt relief after I've stopped but I felt so left out.)
But it would seems EVERYONE is looking at me differently. In a chinese family gathering at such a situation, the pressure is silently deafening.
On the social aspect what could I do? What should I do? What should i not do?
I prayed. I felt like I've prayed so much in those few days, everytime they have the ritual, I pray. and I thank God that ppl around me was talking about my 'difference'. I prayed that the difference would not be a stumbling block - like an anti-social - religion, not wanting to touch or participate in family matters. I prayed and I thank God that I was able to witness for Him. I told him I needed his help because it was difficult to want to please Him first and at the same time draw my family to Him. I prayed for the Lord to have mercy on my family and to protect them. I prayed for my dad, for the Lord to comfort his grief.
God's peace which surpasses all understanding came. During those days, my relatives start to talk about God. "why do you christians don't ......" " why christians only pray to your god.... " I silently thank the Lord, because such questions are, to me, crucial in the progress to know our true and living God. God has used my 'difference' for his glory. I was rejoicing when I discover that.
I also began to see that many of the 'rituals' are really expressions of love for one another. This things are passed down and over time has become now a (spi)'ritual'. The bowing to each other (chinese men don't hug, but we bow). The need for the ritual in the first place (because the intention is to have our love ones to rest in peace). The gathering of family at such a time and spend a whole week mostly sitting down together (with almost nothing to do, really is time for us to catch up, talk about the family/clan and take time to appreciate our relationships and grieve for my granddad).
"... and the greatest of this is Love"
That was the verse that the Lord imparted upon my heart on the 3rd day. At that moment, a certain burden was lifted off my chest. I had a clearer picture of God's intention for me in that particular place.
On the last day, my mom asked if I would join them in the burial ceremony. I agreed without hesitation because I know this would mean so much to them, especially my Dad. Especially my Dad, who is silently suffering at this time. This time it was my brother whom I have had a big fight with who spoke up, very caringly, " kor, if you cannot, it's okay don't do it." During the funeral where we have to have our palms closed and 'pai', my brother whispered the same words to me again. Imagine that!
".. and the greatest of this is Love" !
Praise God who makes all things possible. He has turned the whole situation around. (From a hushed tensioned situation between me and my family) to a good time with my family that day.
To begin with, Nirvana Memorial Park building is a large building - or a large funeral parlour - with plush interior. Almost everyone, if not all, who walked into the reception thought that they have initially go into the wrong place. The notion that a funeral parlour was like a hotel is still quite puzzling to me. They have many rooms in it, like a five star hotel, to conduct many funeral services. Think of it as a FIVE STAR HOTEL for the dead. And yes, they cater to buddhist, taoist, christian...etc. Yeah, you got the picture. Personally, (at least on surface), Nirvana may be a good company to invest in. I don' t think their business model will ever change or need a change for that matter. The system is set.
My granddad's funeral was conducted in a typical buddhist manner. Monks were doing the ritual everynight until the morning that he is buried. All the sons, daughters, grandson, granddaughters and all their spouses are required to join in.
Spiritually, they were doing something. Obviously with joss-sticks, chants, kneeling and bowing, some spiritual exchange was taking place. Although some may disagree with me, I stick to my case. If not, then why do we need the monks chanting, why the joss-stick...etc Out of respect for my granddad and also to my father and all the rest of my family, I joined in the ritual at first. It was not easy and I felt uncomfortable, because I only want to worship Christ - spiritually. After the first 'session; I stopped joining the ritual. This caused a lot of hushed murmur amongst the family. Later in that night, I also had a big arguement with my brother, whom I have not fought with since our childhood days over toys. The arguement probably lasted 2 days.
(The peace of God has never left me, even when im doing the rituals because I focused on the Lord. However, I felt relief after I've stopped but I felt so left out.)
But it would seems EVERYONE is looking at me differently. In a chinese family gathering at such a situation, the pressure is silently deafening.
On the social aspect what could I do? What should I do? What should i not do?
I prayed. I felt like I've prayed so much in those few days, everytime they have the ritual, I pray. and I thank God that ppl around me was talking about my 'difference'. I prayed that the difference would not be a stumbling block - like an anti-social - religion, not wanting to touch or participate in family matters. I prayed and I thank God that I was able to witness for Him. I told him I needed his help because it was difficult to want to please Him first and at the same time draw my family to Him. I prayed for the Lord to have mercy on my family and to protect them. I prayed for my dad, for the Lord to comfort his grief.
God's peace which surpasses all understanding came. During those days, my relatives start to talk about God. "why do you christians don't ......" " why christians only pray to your god.... " I silently thank the Lord, because such questions are, to me, crucial in the progress to know our true and living God. God has used my 'difference' for his glory. I was rejoicing when I discover that.
I also began to see that many of the 'rituals' are really expressions of love for one another. This things are passed down and over time has become now a (spi)'ritual'. The bowing to each other (chinese men don't hug, but we bow). The need for the ritual in the first place (because the intention is to have our love ones to rest in peace). The gathering of family at such a time and spend a whole week mostly sitting down together (with almost nothing to do, really is time for us to catch up, talk about the family/clan and take time to appreciate our relationships and grieve for my granddad).
"... and the greatest of this is Love"
That was the verse that the Lord imparted upon my heart on the 3rd day. At that moment, a certain burden was lifted off my chest. I had a clearer picture of God's intention for me in that particular place.
On the last day, my mom asked if I would join them in the burial ceremony. I agreed without hesitation because I know this would mean so much to them, especially my Dad. Especially my Dad, who is silently suffering at this time. This time it was my brother whom I have had a big fight with who spoke up, very caringly, " kor, if you cannot, it's okay don't do it." During the funeral where we have to have our palms closed and 'pai', my brother whispered the same words to me again. Imagine that!
".. and the greatest of this is Love" !
Praise God who makes all things possible. He has turned the whole situation around. (From a hushed tensioned situation between me and my family) to a good time with my family that day.
Saturday, September 11, 2004
A sad day for my family
It was at about 7am, our baggages were checked in when my brother got the call from his friend, who just happen to by at my house collecting some stuff he left over.
5 minutes later, still stunned at the air port, our entire family cancelled our flight to hong kong, the family holiday that we have planned earlier, and headed home.
It is confirmed, at 720am, 7 Sept 2004, my granddad at age of 91, has passed on from this world.
The funeral rituals took on the whole week from Tuesday to Friday, taking the traditions of a buddhist burial. I would write more on the funeral rituals later, as they have really taught me a lot more about life itself. On Friday, at about 10am. My granddad was buried at Nirvana Park at Semenyih, Selangor, Malaysia.
My granddad lived a good 91 years. He was a strong man. Quit Smoking at about 75 (or thereabouts) after smoking since in his 20s. So to those who think they can't quit. Yes, you can! He was among the immigrants of Chinese that came from China to Klang Valley during the early turn of the last century. Really, part of society that shape our lives here in KL.
While he was alive, he was really quite hard to please. Mainly due to miscommunication because he was very deaf :) Nowadays, I missed him just sitting here in the living room watching TV. 'Shouting' (because to him, he was probably just talking) about this and that on household chores. At 91, he still water the plants everyday, get the mail... The little things that imprints the biggest impression of him to me for the rest of my life.
So, memory of him lives on. It's amazing, a man, at the appointed time returns to the maker. Death as a concept... as puzzling as life itself.
5 minutes later, still stunned at the air port, our entire family cancelled our flight to hong kong, the family holiday that we have planned earlier, and headed home.
It is confirmed, at 720am, 7 Sept 2004, my granddad at age of 91, has passed on from this world.
The funeral rituals took on the whole week from Tuesday to Friday, taking the traditions of a buddhist burial. I would write more on the funeral rituals later, as they have really taught me a lot more about life itself. On Friday, at about 10am. My granddad was buried at Nirvana Park at Semenyih, Selangor, Malaysia.
My granddad lived a good 91 years. He was a strong man. Quit Smoking at about 75 (or thereabouts) after smoking since in his 20s. So to those who think they can't quit. Yes, you can! He was among the immigrants of Chinese that came from China to Klang Valley during the early turn of the last century. Really, part of society that shape our lives here in KL.
While he was alive, he was really quite hard to please. Mainly due to miscommunication because he was very deaf :) Nowadays, I missed him just sitting here in the living room watching TV. 'Shouting' (because to him, he was probably just talking) about this and that on household chores. At 91, he still water the plants everyday, get the mail... The little things that imprints the biggest impression of him to me for the rest of my life.
So, memory of him lives on. It's amazing, a man, at the appointed time returns to the maker. Death as a concept... as puzzling as life itself.
Monday, September 06, 2004
im off for a break!
yay! im off to a family trip for the next couple of days. My family and I are heading to Hong Kong for a super overdued family holiday.
I'm really looking forward to it, esp spending a solid few days with my brother before he heads to UK to further his studies.
Somehow, it feels as if this is the only time I get to spend with him for a long time to come.
I'm really looking forward to it, esp spending a solid few days with my brother before he heads to UK to further his studies.
Somehow, it feels as if this is the only time I get to spend with him for a long time to come.
Tuesday, August 31, 2004
think
I think we ought to be responsible for what we learn.. even from our own church too. Process it. Think it through. Ask the question: why? Check it with the word of God. Pray. If it is good, internalize it and let it build us up.
I'm quite saddened sometimes to talk to people accept all things being told to them, esp in my church. (I'm not dissing my church) I believe we should at the least give a quick thought to what we are feeding our mind. Take for example this:-
One of the biggest joke about humility is this: if you say you're humble then you're not. I have heard this joke a couple times in church.
Really?
What a warp sense of truth.
Number 12:3 Now the man Moses was very humble, more so than any man on the face of the earth.
Except that Moses was himself the author of the first 5 books of the bible. And if u read number 12, moses is really telling the story of how the Lord helped him in a power struggle situation. Telling the story of how humble he is. (can you stand a guy telling you a story about how he won because he was so so so so so great? we have Moses here... think about it.)
I'm quite saddened sometimes to talk to people accept all things being told to them, esp in my church. (I'm not dissing my church) I believe we should at the least give a quick thought to what we are feeding our mind. Take for example this:-
One of the biggest joke about humility is this: if you say you're humble then you're not. I have heard this joke a couple times in church.
Really?
What a warp sense of truth.
Number 12:3 Now the man Moses was very humble, more so than any man on the face of the earth.
Except that Moses was himself the author of the first 5 books of the bible. And if u read number 12, moses is really telling the story of how the Lord helped him in a power struggle situation. Telling the story of how humble he is. (can you stand a guy telling you a story about how he won because he was so so so so so great? we have Moses here... think about it.)
being a Man pt 1
It is unusual for 2 guys to be able to site down and talk about their ideas, passions, heartaches and fear. Even more so, for 2 guys to talk until dawn about such things. Last night was such a night where I'm blessed to hear the heart cry of a brother.
We talked about so many things but the more we talked, the more I was awed by the mighty mighty things the Lord had done and is still doing to our lives. The topic of our conversation cicled around the book - wild at heart - it's a book about being a MAN.
Now, I haven't read that book yet but I have a feeling now I'm gonna enjoy reading. My friend, Lionel was sharing so much from the book that, I pretty much have a good summary of it now
I can't remember how we started talk about it but recent happenings like finding out that a few of my buddies - those i know from high school times - are in homosexual relationships. The reflection on my own relationship with my father, with my gf... etc has lead me to ponder upon that questions for many nights. I ask myself what is a REAL MAN - god's prespective.
It proved to be a difficult thing to answer these days. "Where have all the real man gone?" (don't u often hear that in Oprah show?)
On magazines, real men knows what to do in bed. 10 steps to get her coming for more.... and more.... real men are hunks- big lean sex machines! (yeah we all love to think that we are) and depending on magazines, some say guys should be the senstivie new age guy who is sensitive to your every needs(that means good sex, good pampering after that and good food too), or that metro-guy who knows how to take care of their looks and stuff -- really i can't remember the spelling. How about the rockstar guy, messy, don't gives a shit but so damn enigmatic. Chick digs him.
If you ain't got the MOJO - you ain't have it going dude.
And what about the church thinks real man are? do they smoke? do they swear? do they drink? do they pretend not to check out the really hot chicks with legs to heaven that just walk past them? do they come for all the prayer meets? are they sensible at all times, polite and soft-spoken? are these the qualities of a real man? are these the values of real men? Are church producing mere - Nice boys or REAL men?
We talked about so many things but the more we talked, the more I was awed by the mighty mighty things the Lord had done and is still doing to our lives. The topic of our conversation cicled around the book - wild at heart - it's a book about being a MAN.
Now, I haven't read that book yet but I have a feeling now I'm gonna enjoy reading. My friend, Lionel was sharing so much from the book that, I pretty much have a good summary of it now
I can't remember how we started talk about it but recent happenings like finding out that a few of my buddies - those i know from high school times - are in homosexual relationships. The reflection on my own relationship with my father, with my gf... etc has lead me to ponder upon that questions for many nights. I ask myself what is a REAL MAN - god's prespective.
It proved to be a difficult thing to answer these days. "Where have all the real man gone?" (don't u often hear that in Oprah show?)
On magazines, real men knows what to do in bed. 10 steps to get her coming for more.... and more.... real men are hunks- big lean sex machines! (yeah we all love to think that we are) and depending on magazines, some say guys should be the senstivie new age guy who is sensitive to your every needs(that means good sex, good pampering after that and good food too), or that metro-guy who knows how to take care of their looks and stuff -- really i can't remember the spelling. How about the rockstar guy, messy, don't gives a shit but so damn enigmatic. Chick digs him.
If you ain't got the MOJO - you ain't have it going dude.
And what about the church thinks real man are? do they smoke? do they swear? do they drink? do they pretend not to check out the really hot chicks with legs to heaven that just walk past them? do they come for all the prayer meets? are they sensible at all times, polite and soft-spoken? are these the qualities of a real man? are these the values of real men? Are church producing mere - Nice boys or REAL men?
Monday, August 30, 2004
busy busy week
I haven't got much time to put a new post in my blog. However, I thought that if I don't do it, my interest will just eventually fizzle out. Die a natural death.
There was a couple of good 'blog' incident last week, im gonna jot them down here so that the lessons leaves an imprint in my mind.
Olympics. I haven't got much time to watch the games but when I do, I admire the athelets body. Great Bods there man! I don't just mean the beach volley ball girls.... I mean all of the atheletes, their entire body is tune, mould to perform a specific task. Compare that to the models I see on cover pages or the next hot chick on MTV or that hunky guy that my gf is drooling over....
Just reminds me how the media has been able to skewed my perception of what a 'good body' is. It's a good reminder that God has given us able bodies to do amazing thing.
I played in the worship team for a prayer rally to celebrate our nation's independence days. 31st August. Malaysia's 47. Man it was awesome. God ministered powerfully to me during the rally. I felt that I should spend more time praying for my own country. After the rally, the team went on a food rampage -- cause our worship leader bought us dinner! 7 of us finished food intended for 12. hahaha! :P it was great fun because there was plenty of food and laughter to go around the able. (actually we could do with more food.... but that'll be another story)
Principles. After writing and thinking about principles, I am beginning to sense a change in how I approach people. I am usually/often/almost always too eager to jump on the behavioural part of things-- eg. don't do that... I gotta do more of.....
Now, I understand that ppl do certain actions because of an inner principles. Also, I am beginning to learn that I can't change ppl, I can only try influencing. So instead of jumping the gun and say don't do it.. I ask, 'why' questions. Praise God. Allow me to understand so much more about the people around me and myself.
There was a couple of good 'blog' incident last week, im gonna jot them down here so that the lessons leaves an imprint in my mind.
Olympics. I haven't got much time to watch the games but when I do, I admire the athelets body. Great Bods there man! I don't just mean the beach volley ball girls.... I mean all of the atheletes, their entire body is tune, mould to perform a specific task. Compare that to the models I see on cover pages or the next hot chick on MTV or that hunky guy that my gf is drooling over....
Just reminds me how the media has been able to skewed my perception of what a 'good body' is. It's a good reminder that God has given us able bodies to do amazing thing.
I played in the worship team for a prayer rally to celebrate our nation's independence days. 31st August. Malaysia's 47. Man it was awesome. God ministered powerfully to me during the rally. I felt that I should spend more time praying for my own country. After the rally, the team went on a food rampage -- cause our worship leader bought us dinner! 7 of us finished food intended for 12. hahaha! :P it was great fun because there was plenty of food and laughter to go around the able. (actually we could do with more food.... but that'll be another story)
Principles. After writing and thinking about principles, I am beginning to sense a change in how I approach people. I am usually/often/almost always too eager to jump on the behavioural part of things-- eg. don't do that... I gotta do more of.....
Now, I understand that ppl do certain actions because of an inner principles. Also, I am beginning to learn that I can't change ppl, I can only try influencing. So instead of jumping the gun and say don't do it.. I ask, 'why' questions. Praise God. Allow me to understand so much more about the people around me and myself.
Tuesday, August 24, 2004
Running
I think July and August must have been some of the toughest month I've been through this year. Work was tough. Ministry work was more taxing. Liping's mom was hospitalized. Something seems to be happening everyday.
So, I guess it's understandable that I may feel a little down on some days. Today, for some reason, is one of 'those'.
I feel as though, the challenges and changes never ends. I wished I had taken the path more often travelled so that things look more... stable? I wished I had simple solutions to do to solve the problems I am facing, I wish, I wish.... (when you wish upon the star..... ) I scream ," why is life so difficult?!"
I'm sure the reader of this have gone through your own fare share of bad time.
For me however, when things look so gloom, all I can do is hang on to His promises. Rather, all I can do is almost hang on to His promises and pray that His promises hangs on to me.
Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds. Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that yuo may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Some part of me screams: 'yeah right!', the rest simply echoes with fear and confusion inside my little head. Doubts cloud my thoughts and my heart simmers with anxiety.
Somehow somewhere, deep inside, a little tiny whinny voice, with such authority, such clarity tells me to hang on. It's not even a word. When that voice is squeezed between thoughts of doubts I calm down just enough to remember the great and mighty things that He has done in my life.
I remember the first day when I believed in Him. That same still silence voice. Sweetness.
Yesterday, I was praying and memorizing scriptures and praying in tonguse while I'm running. The holy spirit just came and filled me. I wanted to give up so many times because really, my stamina is really bad... but the spirit just kept me on. Somehow my run yesterday felt like a spiritual journey, (elaborating it will take another hour for me to blog), but as i prayed and pressed on. On my 30th minute, a certain burden just lifted and I cruised on with the spirit to finish of my run. I felt great. I felt the sense of fufilment that comes from the joy when I overcome with the help of the Lord's strength. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.
To me, that was a valuable lesson. Life is like the run. The journey. The destination. To run the good race and keep pressing on. And through it all, surely, He is with us always.
So, I guess it's understandable that I may feel a little down on some days. Today, for some reason, is one of 'those'.
I feel as though, the challenges and changes never ends. I wished I had taken the path more often travelled so that things look more... stable? I wished I had simple solutions to do to solve the problems I am facing, I wish, I wish.... (when you wish upon the star..... ) I scream ," why is life so difficult?!"
I'm sure the reader of this have gone through your own fare share of bad time.
For me however, when things look so gloom, all I can do is hang on to His promises. Rather, all I can do is almost hang on to His promises and pray that His promises hangs on to me.
Consider it pure joy when you face trials of many kinds. Because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that yuo may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
Some part of me screams: 'yeah right!', the rest simply echoes with fear and confusion inside my little head. Doubts cloud my thoughts and my heart simmers with anxiety.
Somehow somewhere, deep inside, a little tiny whinny voice, with such authority, such clarity tells me to hang on. It's not even a word. When that voice is squeezed between thoughts of doubts I calm down just enough to remember the great and mighty things that He has done in my life.
I remember the first day when I believed in Him. That same still silence voice. Sweetness.
Yesterday, I was praying and memorizing scriptures and praying in tonguse while I'm running. The holy spirit just came and filled me. I wanted to give up so many times because really, my stamina is really bad... but the spirit just kept me on. Somehow my run yesterday felt like a spiritual journey, (elaborating it will take another hour for me to blog), but as i prayed and pressed on. On my 30th minute, a certain burden just lifted and I cruised on with the spirit to finish of my run. I felt great. I felt the sense of fufilment that comes from the joy when I overcome with the help of the Lord's strength. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.
To me, that was a valuable lesson. Life is like the run. The journey. The destination. To run the good race and keep pressing on. And through it all, surely, He is with us always.
Monday, August 23, 2004
awesome worship
I had an awesome time of worship in church yesterday during the second celebration.
I think it all started on stage when elliot, our drummer started grooving. (Technically, it really started way before in the prayers and all... ) It was like BOOM. our bass man Ian follow suit. I looked at elliot at this point and saw that indiscribably smile/joy on his face. He was just banging away, the bass was slapping. Steve on 2nd keys was practically standing up and dancing while Evelyn was out of smilling from ear to ear....
He was just breath-taking/
.... the rest of the worship felt like I was being swept off my feet by awe in his presence, the excitement of what he is going to do, the joy that he is dancing with us. All at the same time.
the Lord's presences was so strong to me on stage that I was shouting and cheering.... even in the slow songs! the music was just too loud on stage for anyone to hear me, which was great cause I could cheer for my Lord at the top of my voice!
PRAISE HIM! YEAH!
His presence was so strong, I'm still feeling the resonance today!
We usually have a time of sharing after we play on stage. During that time... the joy of the Lord just allowed each one of us to talk freely. We laughed so so much at each other's joke that my stomach ache! and at the same time cried for those who are going through tough times.
all praise and glory to our lord jesus christ.
I think it all started on stage when elliot, our drummer started grooving. (Technically, it really started way before in the prayers and all... ) It was like BOOM. our bass man Ian follow suit. I looked at elliot at this point and saw that indiscribably smile/joy on his face. He was just banging away, the bass was slapping. Steve on 2nd keys was practically standing up and dancing while Evelyn was out of smilling from ear to ear....
He was just breath-taking/
.... the rest of the worship felt like I was being swept off my feet by awe in his presence, the excitement of what he is going to do, the joy that he is dancing with us. All at the same time.
the Lord's presences was so strong to me on stage that I was shouting and cheering.... even in the slow songs! the music was just too loud on stage for anyone to hear me, which was great cause I could cheer for my Lord at the top of my voice!
PRAISE HIM! YEAH!
His presence was so strong, I'm still feeling the resonance today!
We usually have a time of sharing after we play on stage. During that time... the joy of the Lord just allowed each one of us to talk freely. We laughed so so much at each other's joke that my stomach ache! and at the same time cried for those who are going through tough times.
all praise and glory to our lord jesus christ.
Thursday, August 19, 2004
eat my words
Pr. 18.21 The tongue has the power of life and death, and those who love it wil eat its fruit.
I haven't really gave a serious thought about this verse. I took it that we have to watch our words because it bear consequences if we say the wrong things to the wrong ppl at the wrong time.
However Pastor Jean Lim took it to a new level for me. She reminded me that it is our Lord Jesus who is in control of everything. So why say things like , 'surely I am not going to (fill in your own blanks here)' when it's in God's control and not man. Why say it at all because
Our words have the power of life and death......
Indeed. Spiritually we see how we use our lips to praise, to chant, to curse, to pray, to speak in tongues. In the world, we see and/or hear a lot on positive self-talk, your inner conversation- out of the abundance of your heart, your lips speaks. what are we saying to ourselves? to others? do I use the word: challenging or difficult? do I say, I can or I can't ; I need or I want .... Is our words shaping us? or are we shaping our words?
..... and those who love it wil eat its fruit
whether you think you can or can't. you are right. (henry ford)
I am not sure what it means by those who love it - love the words or love to talk? however one thing is sure, we eat it's fruit - the good the bad and the works. I wonder (and fear) about the words I choose to use. Am I bringing life or death?
Pr 18.20 From the fruit of his mouth a man's stomach is filled; with the harvest from his lips he is satisfied
I haven't really gave a serious thought about this verse. I took it that we have to watch our words because it bear consequences if we say the wrong things to the wrong ppl at the wrong time.
However Pastor Jean Lim took it to a new level for me. She reminded me that it is our Lord Jesus who is in control of everything. So why say things like , 'surely I am not going to (fill in your own blanks here)' when it's in God's control and not man. Why say it at all because
Our words have the power of life and death......
Indeed. Spiritually we see how we use our lips to praise, to chant, to curse, to pray, to speak in tongues. In the world, we see and/or hear a lot on positive self-talk, your inner conversation- out of the abundance of your heart, your lips speaks. what are we saying to ourselves? to others? do I use the word: challenging or difficult? do I say, I can or I can't ; I need or I want .... Is our words shaping us? or are we shaping our words?
..... and those who love it wil eat its fruit
whether you think you can or can't. you are right. (henry ford)
I am not sure what it means by those who love it - love the words or love to talk? however one thing is sure, we eat it's fruit - the good the bad and the works. I wonder (and fear) about the words I choose to use. Am I bringing life or death?
Pr 18.20 From the fruit of his mouth a man's stomach is filled; with the harvest from his lips he is satisfied
oprah
I have gathered my courage.
Swallowed my pride.
Endured my gf's 'grin' (i don't know what she means when she smiles like that)
and i will say it now on public domain!!!
I love OPRAH WINFREY show!
Swallowed my pride.
Endured my gf's 'grin' (i don't know what she means when she smiles like that)
and i will say it now on public domain!!!
I love OPRAH WINFREY show!
Tuesday, August 17, 2004
that's a load of shit!
I had thought that today would be a tough day. I have like a zillion things to do and everything's due yesterday. Sounds familiar already?
However, after my first cup of Neslo - Nescafe Coffee + Milo... things seems much more manageable. Nothing like the first cup in the morning! I can feel that little buzz in my head.
Praise God when Noel decided to buy me lunch at Ganna Curry house. The bananna leaf rice there, some say it's the best in PJ, is great. (gosh do i hear a lot of disagreements already?) Yes food does wonders and by lunch, im pretty happy handling all the stuff that's thrown my way and all around me.
However, in line with every visit to good curry houses.....what goes in must comes out....
inevitably, sooner or later.
at about... no exactly 4:10.11 pm afternoon according to my pc time.... i had to go.. to do the big one. to sit on the throne. to bomb. to go boldly where no man has gone before...
A new experience EVERYtime. Indeed
13 minutes later..... i think i feel 2 kg lighter. I think I left 2 kg back in there. no i don't want to go into the toilet right now. yes, ive flushed twiced, in case there's left overs. i am sure there's no floaters nor submarines. there is none, and i am absolutely sure, none stuck at the bottom too. yes i checked. yes, toilet seat's up. yes i managed the splashes pretty well.... sorry what? my hands? what about my hands?.....
erm yeah.. i rinsed it. I mean..er... I washed it... with soap. wanna smell?
there must me a whole load of shit produced around the world each day...
6 billion ppl x 0. 2kg (say on average.. yes i know, on some days im 10times the average man). = 1.2billion kg of shit produced daily on planet earth!
woohoo... maybe thats the real cause of global warming. we're still feeling the 'warmth of the freshly baked cake'
However, after my first cup of Neslo - Nescafe Coffee + Milo... things seems much more manageable. Nothing like the first cup in the morning! I can feel that little buzz in my head.
Praise God when Noel decided to buy me lunch at Ganna Curry house. The bananna leaf rice there, some say it's the best in PJ, is great. (gosh do i hear a lot of disagreements already?) Yes food does wonders and by lunch, im pretty happy handling all the stuff that's thrown my way and all around me.
However, in line with every visit to good curry houses.....what goes in must comes out....
inevitably, sooner or later.
at about... no exactly 4:10.11 pm afternoon according to my pc time.... i had to go.. to do the big one. to sit on the throne. to bomb. to go boldly where no man has gone before...
A new experience EVERYtime. Indeed
13 minutes later..... i think i feel 2 kg lighter. I think I left 2 kg back in there. no i don't want to go into the toilet right now. yes, ive flushed twiced, in case there's left overs. i am sure there's no floaters nor submarines. there is none, and i am absolutely sure, none stuck at the bottom too. yes i checked. yes, toilet seat's up. yes i managed the splashes pretty well.... sorry what? my hands? what about my hands?.....
erm yeah.. i rinsed it. I mean..er... I washed it... with soap. wanna smell?
there must me a whole load of shit produced around the world each day...
6 billion ppl x 0. 2kg (say on average.. yes i know, on some days im 10times the average man). = 1.2billion kg of shit produced daily on planet earth!
woohoo... maybe thats the real cause of global warming. we're still feeling the 'warmth of the freshly baked cake'
Monday, August 16, 2004
my secret stash
Since saturday, I have been thinking a lot of about my core values and principles. About the hows and whys i do the things i do, the way i do it in my relationship, in my business dealings... etc. The cool thing about principles is that they are in some ways like relational formulas. Once you've formulate them, you just keep applying it and it becomes automatic. It helps to give me a quick and accurate decision making process.
I wonder just how many of my principles are in tuned with those of the Lord. How many of them are skewed by 'world' view and just how many more are formed over the years due to my own wants and desire.
The heart is deceitful, who can understand it?
Those dark secret doors. I only fear what's behind them.
*********
I tend to be over dominant and pushy when I want something done. My parents, my biz partners and my gf use the same word -- bulldoze.
In the process, I hurt feelings. I (appear) totally unemotional. Although most of the time, my intentions are good, my tone and body language just lets ppl know that the only thing i care about is getting MY job done.
I wonder what is at the core of me. This is certainly a very dark spot that I hope God can wave a magic wand and *puffs* I'm changed. Apparently not so.
I think I suffer for a lack of respect for other ppl's boundaries and myself. (If you have read the book boundaries by Henry Cloud you may have a better idea what I am talking about) It's an issue where I have to learn how to love my own boundaries and be responsible for how I feel and yet at respect and love others for theirs.
I've learn recently that you really can't change anyone, but one can try to influence them-- only after they know you care.
Lord I just pray that you help me in this area of dealing with people and that I may capture the spirit of servanthood and leardership.
I wonder just how many of my principles are in tuned with those of the Lord. How many of them are skewed by 'world' view and just how many more are formed over the years due to my own wants and desire.
The heart is deceitful, who can understand it?
Those dark secret doors. I only fear what's behind them.
*********
I tend to be over dominant and pushy when I want something done. My parents, my biz partners and my gf use the same word -- bulldoze.
In the process, I hurt feelings. I (appear) totally unemotional. Although most of the time, my intentions are good, my tone and body language just lets ppl know that the only thing i care about is getting MY job done.
I wonder what is at the core of me. This is certainly a very dark spot that I hope God can wave a magic wand and *puffs* I'm changed. Apparently not so.
I think I suffer for a lack of respect for other ppl's boundaries and myself. (If you have read the book boundaries by Henry Cloud you may have a better idea what I am talking about) It's an issue where I have to learn how to love my own boundaries and be responsible for how I feel and yet at respect and love others for theirs.
I've learn recently that you really can't change anyone, but one can try to influence them-- only after they know you care.
Lord I just pray that you help me in this area of dealing with people and that I may capture the spirit of servanthood and leardership.
Saturday, August 14, 2004
don't mess with my secret stash
A close friend invited me to a talk he was organizing today - Urban Protection Tactics - on self-protection. It was a pleasant surprise to see how they address self-protecion. One would certainly expect your regular martial arts training... how to kick that, how to break stuff, be a lean mean killing machine. However, it was instead an hour of good basic fundamentals on how to 'think' for our own safety....think it through.. be proactive.....etc etc. very helpful. I strongly recommend it. and yes! they don't pay me for putting it on my blog. here's their website http://www.blitzkriegconsultants.com/index.htm
One of the things mentioned in the talk was that our behaviour is a result of our mental decision. and our mental decision a result of how we feel. Some ppl says it this way. You have to start BEING before you can start thinking like it, before you can start acting like it. Be a winner. Think like you're a winner. Then do the things required of a winner to win. In other words, if you think you've lost or feel that it is so... you're lost.
emotion -> mental -> physical.
being -> thinking --> doing.
Reminds me of all the things I try to change in my life. I tend to get stuck in the doing part. I wake up early. I must control my diet. I must be more competitive. I must do my quiet time. I...etc etc etc.
I have been trying to change my resulting phyiscal action without changing my inner core values.
It is no surprise that most of us failed in fufilling our new year resolution or any other change we want for ourselves. I know, coz i haven't been able to do my quiet time regularly, eat regularly with less rice, do more running, listen more, be more competitive, be more gentle.....
However, I wanna give God the praise and glory for all the changes that He brought to my life. Each time He messes with my innercore, I feel like shit. man! SHIT is an understatement. I feel almost painful.... who likes to be messed with anyway? but I'm glad He did and he continues to do so that the work He begin will be complete on the day of the Lord Jesus.
.. and in a literal sense, when my innercore is changed.... my life is changed. and so is my music. I just got a new groove in my heart.
One of the things mentioned in the talk was that our behaviour is a result of our mental decision. and our mental decision a result of how we feel. Some ppl says it this way. You have to start BEING before you can start thinking like it, before you can start acting like it. Be a winner. Think like you're a winner. Then do the things required of a winner to win. In other words, if you think you've lost or feel that it is so... you're lost.
emotion -> mental -> physical.
being -> thinking --> doing.
Reminds me of all the things I try to change in my life. I tend to get stuck in the doing part. I wake up early. I must control my diet. I must be more competitive. I must do my quiet time. I...etc etc etc.
I have been trying to change my resulting phyiscal action without changing my inner core values.
It is no surprise that most of us failed in fufilling our new year resolution or any other change we want for ourselves. I know, coz i haven't been able to do my quiet time regularly, eat regularly with less rice, do more running, listen more, be more competitive, be more gentle.....
However, I wanna give God the praise and glory for all the changes that He brought to my life. Each time He messes with my innercore, I feel like shit. man! SHIT is an understatement. I feel almost painful.... who likes to be messed with anyway? but I'm glad He did and he continues to do so that the work He begin will be complete on the day of the Lord Jesus.
.. and in a literal sense, when my innercore is changed.... my life is changed. and so is my music. I just got a new groove in my heart.
Friday, August 13, 2004
what im talkative?
hey... im not talkative... i just type REALLY fast...
(who am i kidding?)
sincerely,
self-disillusionist.
(who am i kidding?)
sincerely,
self-disillusionist.
Thursday, August 12, 2004
am I hiding?
It's been a terribly hectic day for me. I woke feeling really energized. Now, I'm quite happy slumped over my chair typing out this blog.
the funny thing about now is that I have been looking forward to this very moment when i have some time to spare to write down some thoughts.. about the way I see things, the way things see me or maybe about perhaps how God see things.
but now that i am doing it... all thoughts seems to elude my mind.
why? perhaps i was too busy doing stuff that I forgot to live? I can't even remember what i ate for lunch...
(pause for effect)
nah... maybe that's cause I haven't warm up to writting yet. I am talkative says Grace Tan. haha :P
Things seems just so sureal when i reflect upon today.
God spoke to me today when I was on my way to an appointment from 2 Cor 2 . here follow this link to go there http://www.bible.org/cgi-bin/netbible.pl?header=on&book=2co&chapter=1
It continues to amaze me the unsurmountable grace that the Lord have for us. His abundance of love for us. It's just still so unnatural for me to bath in his love -- all the time -- esp during those dark times (that each of us will and must face). We hide ourselves from Him, just like adam and eve did... and I thought we knew better!!! He is God who sees everything, come one be realistic.. yet we still hide. Hey if no one knows, what the @#$% right?
I'm just so amazed how Paul writes it :
For if I make you sad, who would be left to make me glad but the one I caused to be sad?....
who indeed?
I wonder if God says the same thing to me when I'm hiding from Him.
I wonder, if my Dad says the same thing to me, in his heart when i piss him off.
I flash back to the many times i made my dad angry, and wonder what goes through his heart. All anger, all frustration, all tears and yet so much love. I know sometimes I stretch that love, and yet I know without a doubt my dad love me. unconditionally.
what more of God.
and paul continues.... forgive him.. because this will keep him from being overwhelmed by excessive grief to the point of despair... and if I have forgiven anything....
(eric may have said: he was worried that we are overwhelmed? comeon that guy has @#$@%^ let's kick his ass and leave him be a little while....)
so aren't we all lucky that we have a God... (and a good reason why i am not God.. coz if I am.. muahahahahahahah.... MUHAHAHAHAHAA. you get the picture)
the funny thing about now is that I have been looking forward to this very moment when i have some time to spare to write down some thoughts.. about the way I see things, the way things see me or maybe about perhaps how God see things.
but now that i am doing it... all thoughts seems to elude my mind.
why? perhaps i was too busy doing stuff that I forgot to live? I can't even remember what i ate for lunch...
(pause for effect)
nah... maybe that's cause I haven't warm up to writting yet. I am talkative says Grace Tan. haha :P
Things seems just so sureal when i reflect upon today.
God spoke to me today when I was on my way to an appointment from 2 Cor 2 . here follow this link to go there http://www.bible.org/cgi-bin/netbible.pl?header=on&book=2co&chapter=1
It continues to amaze me the unsurmountable grace that the Lord have for us. His abundance of love for us. It's just still so unnatural for me to bath in his love -- all the time -- esp during those dark times (that each of us will and must face). We hide ourselves from Him, just like adam and eve did... and I thought we knew better!!! He is God who sees everything, come one be realistic.. yet we still hide. Hey if no one knows, what the @#$% right?
I'm just so amazed how Paul writes it :
For if I make you sad, who would be left to make me glad but the one I caused to be sad?....
who indeed?
I wonder if God says the same thing to me when I'm hiding from Him.
I wonder, if my Dad says the same thing to me, in his heart when i piss him off.
I flash back to the many times i made my dad angry, and wonder what goes through his heart. All anger, all frustration, all tears and yet so much love. I know sometimes I stretch that love, and yet I know without a doubt my dad love me. unconditionally.
what more of God.
and paul continues.... forgive him.. because this will keep him from being overwhelmed by excessive grief to the point of despair... and if I have forgiven anything....
(eric may have said: he was worried that we are overwhelmed? comeon that guy has @#$@%^ let's kick his ass and leave him be a little while....)
so aren't we all lucky that we have a God... (and a good reason why i am not God.. coz if I am.. muahahahahahahah.... MUHAHAHAHAHAA. you get the picture)
Wednesday, August 11, 2004
huh? what... a blog? what's a blog?
After the inital of 'huh? what's a blog?' I think ive always liked the idea of having a blog online. It's like a diary, just typed. No frillz. Besides you don't have the problem of - 'oh no! i 've ran out of pages... or ink!! '
I think a blog's great to record down random but useful thoughts so that I can remind myself of all the lesson God is teaching me. And I hope that..... and in some manner that my life may bless you or get us feel connected... to make us all feel like we're in this together.
so, here it goes... baby!!!!
I think a blog's great to record down random but useful thoughts so that I can remind myself of all the lesson God is teaching me. And I hope that..... and in some manner that my life may bless you or get us feel connected... to make us all feel like we're in this together.
so, here it goes... baby!!!!
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